Updated: Mar 30, 2019
We as human beings come to start life surrounded by a family and with time we find out a way to interact with others that share similar lifestyles or believes and with time those groups of people become part of our lives. For many reasons it's important to have a group of people that can bring you comfort, joy and support as a community. Having a close community (or tribe, how I like to call it) is very essential for our mental, emotional and spiritual life. That is way, I want to share with you this next article that I love, because it explains the importance of having a support group. Dr Julie Connor gives beautiful tips in how to find the perfect tribe for you:
"Build your Support System
Although technology creates swift channels of communication and connections throughout the world, many people struggle alone as they face life challenges.
“We want people who understand us and can be depended upon during tough times,” explains Cathy Williams, MSW, LCSW, CEAP. “We need people who listen and give us honest feedback.”
A support system equips you with tools to cope with stress and increases your life expectancy. Support reduces depression and anxiety. Williams adds, “Giving and receiving support from others is a basic human need.”
Leanne Fredrich, life coach and blogger at AmazingMondays.com, insists, “When you are with your tribe [or your support system], you feel inspired to create, take chances and most of all you feel at home. Even if your passion requires a certain amount of solitude, you still need a tribe.” Although circumstances may force you to spend large amounts of time by yourself or with people you would not typically choose as friends, your support system is a central network with whom you find trust, mutual support, and strength.
It is particularly difficult to build a new support system after you’ve experienced a jolting life change such as a move, school or job change, or relationship changes. Unlike family, Ken Robinson, author of The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything, explains, “Tribe members can be collaborators or contributors.” He adds, “What connects a tribe is a common commitment to the thing they feel born to do. This can be extraordinarily liberating, especially if you’ve been pursuing your passion alone.”
In my book, Dreams to Action Trailblazer’s Guide, I explain how to build your support system. Surround yourself with people who eagerly encourage you and celebrate your success. Build supportive relationships. Networking events, Mastermind groups, neighborhood clubs, and school and church activities offer opportunities for like-minded individuals to share similar goals, acknowledge progress, and hold one another accountable for completing individual and group projects and commitments.
You may have more than one support system. Consider these questions as you think about finding or adding new members to your circle of support:
Social Support Do I have one or more close friends? Do I take part in social activities? How am I (or how can I become) involved in active service to others?
Health and Wellness Support What changes in my diet would I like to make? Do I want to develop an exercise routine? What lifestyle changes can I make to improve my health?
Emotional Support Do I have hobbies? Do I take part in social activities? Who can I talk to when I need emotional support?
Family Support How do I define my family? How can I be more supportive and engaged with my family? In what ways can I let my family know what support I need?
Mental and Intellectual Support What new skills or information would I like to learn? Do I want to learn or pursue a new hobby or interest? Where would I like to learn it?
Career and Educational Support What is my ideal job? What skills and knowledge do I use or need to maintain or pursue my career and educational goals? How can I learn new skills and knowledge?
Financial Support What resources are available to finance other goals? How much would I like save and invest my resources? How would I like my share my wealth with others?
Spiritual Support Do I have a regular practice of prayer or meditation? Do I belong to a spiritual community? How would I like to become more actively involved in spiritual community activities?
Seth Godin, author of Tribes: We Need You to Lead Us, explains, “For millions of years, human beings have been part of one tribe or another. A group needs only two things to be a tribe: a shared interest and a way to communicate.” Trust your instincts to guide you to the right people. And trust your instincts enough to know when it is time to part ways with member of your tribe. Not all relationships are permanent – nor are they meant to be.
When someone enters your life for a reason, you typically share a common purpose, desire, or interest. Like an ad hoc committee, you move on after you meet or fulfill your common purpose. Relationships that evolve over the course of a season provide you with support, encouragement, and opportunities to learn and grow. Seasonal relationships may change when you move, change jobs, or change relationships. Lifetime relationships stand the test of time and are grounded in strong emotional commitments to one another. Even in death, the relationship can change, but the love endures.
19th century philosopher, William James, wrote, “The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitude of mind. If you can change your mind, you can change your life.”
So, how do you start to build a support system? Creating a strong network takes time. You don’t have to know how to move forward; you only have to be brave enough to take the next step.
Trust your judgement. Listen to your instincts. A circle of support is waiting for you.
Who is in your support system? Who would you like to include in your circle of support?"
… Having a tribe or different tribes in our lives can help us to fight so many problems that our society is facing nowadays. As I mentioned in my post of "Let’s choose: Depression and Anxiety or a Marvelous Life" we have the option to live a better and amazing life. Having a tribe (in my experience) can reduce stress and anxiety, allows us to appreciate what we have, give and receive. A tribe, just to mention a few, can let us communicate, share, feel understood, feel cheered up, get inspired, find trust, get strength and support. We need those groups for better mental health.
There are so many options and many places where to start finding your tribe or probably tribes. We can find groups of moms, dads, friends, groups that share hobbies, spiritual believes, yoga, or exercise. The important thing here is to be yourself and complement your self with others to grow and learn more.
I hope that with this post you already have more ideas in how to embrace new tribes in your life. I invite you to live fully the amazing experience to be part of tribes.
From my heart to yours,
Namaste - Cecilia de la Rocha
Cecilia de la Rocha is founder of Yoga By Cecilia de la Rocha, a creative and enthusiastic yoga instructor with professional training in hatha & anusara yoga. Always willing to share more with people in a different, loving & fun ways. Her teaching is an innovative fusion of yoga, metaphysics, mindfulness and shadow work that has taught many families, from moms to be, to kids, to adults of all ages and limitations, and to celebrities who want to incorporate yoga as part of their lifestyle. She loves to facilitate privates and group workshops. For more information about her work, please visit: https://yogabycecilia.wixsite.com/yogalifestyle